4 Things To Keep In Mind Before Adopting A Child
When you adopt a child, it is a big decision. The adoption process has a number of obstacles that are worth mentioning and analyzing.
Adoptive parents do not just play the role of caregivers. There is also much more to come. Adopting a child means loving them just as if they were biological. The main goal is to form a loving and caring family.
It is a very complicated process to go through when adopting a child. It is very normal for soon-to-be adoptive parents to have many questions and fears around it. Adoptive parents tend to have many questions and mixed feelings inside them. They think of things like, “Do I want to be a good father / mother?”, “Do I want them to love me?”, Or “Do we want to be a real family?”
One of the biggest concerns of adoptive parents is that their children will not feel loved. The funny thing about it is that the child probably has the same thoughts and worries regarding their future parents.
Adopting a child is a big responsibility since the child must feel loved and protected. Adopted children do not have to save parents. They just need parents who know how to deal with fear in a confident way.
4 things to keep in mind before adopting a child
According to the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child , adoption is not a tool for solving fertility problems, but a goal to protect abandoned children.
Adopting a child is not something to be taken lightly
The first question that prospective adoptive parents should answer is both simple and profound: Why do you want to adopt a child?
After answering this question and deciding to adopt, a difficult process begins. Adoption agencies evaluate people to find out if they are ideal candidates for a particular child. Their lives are thoroughly analyzed with the sole purpose of finding the best family for the child. This often makes the adoptive parents very nervous, but it is something that just needs to be done.
When you adopt a child, it is a long process. In many cases it is also very difficult. The professionals responsible for this process must delve very deeply into various topics such as work, friendship, and the overall lifestyle of the prospective adoptive parents.
Applicants often think that all these questions and interviews are exaggerated. However, it is important to just be patient and not lose sight of the ultimate goal : adopting a child. On the other hand, the interviewers who are responsible for performing this task should be sensitive and empathetic.
Preparing for the interviews when you adopt a child
Some applicants want to adopt a child right away and the whole adoption process seems endless to them. The criteria that prospective adoptive parents must meet may seem subjective and unfair. However, they are actually governed by laws laid down by international conventions and make a lot of sense.
The interviewers ask the applicants about the motivation that makes them want to adopt. In addition, they dig deep into their relationships, their personalities, their physical relationships, and their ability to consolidate and develop an adoptive relationship .
Adopting a child is not the same as charity
Let’s be clear: adoption is not charity work. Both the parents and the adopted child have experienced difficulties. They will all begin to be healed when they form their new family. Decisions are about building a better future together, it is not a service. It is a mutual illusion.
The parents’ wishes are fulfilled when they take the child home. However, this is not the end because there is still a lot of work to be done. It is important to keep this in mind because some parents think they are done after it. Adoptive parents should always be ready to face other people’s questions in a confident and positive way.
On the other hand, it is important to note that children are the most important thing when it comes to adoption. Parents are also important, there is no doubt about that. But children are the ones who are unprotected and have fewer resources.
To begin a new life
It is difficult to predict how the adopted child will adapt to his new family and home. The adjustment process is even more complicated when it comes to children from other countries. Their past history, experiences and lifestyle can influence their adaptation to their new environment.
Contrary to many people’s beliefs, adoptive children seem to adapt to their new surroundings (on a personal, social, family, and educational level). In fact, it is sometimes difficult to separate adopted children from those who have not been adopted, because they adapt to their new life quite simply and positively.
A good piece of advice we can give new adoptive parents is to become friends with other adoptive parents. If things get tough, let them share their stories, experiences and feelings with you. It is also important not to have preconceived notions about the adjustment period in the family after the child’s arrival. It is a stage where both the child and the parents begin to establish a bond based on love, respect and mutual trust.
