I’m Trying To Be A Better Person, But I Still Have The Right To Mess It Up With

When embarking on a journey of personal growth, remember that it is a process. Changes will not happen overnight. You still have the right to mess it up.

To get results, you need to be persistent and disciplined. However, you probably hope that your loved ones will help and support you along the way.

For this reason, it is easy to get angry and disappointed when these people seem to take advantage of a setback to downplay their efforts. Some people forget that even if you try to be a better person, you still have the right to mess it up.

Therefore, it is important that you are aware that you must be your most important engine for change. If you are waiting for approval, recognition and support from those around you, you will want to give up before you reach your goal.

You have to change yourself and for yourself. You must become your own personal supervisor and facilitator. However, it is a good idea to ask yourself why others might want to hold you back and how to deal with it if they do.

When others forget that you have the right to mess it up

You have probably found yourself in different situations that reflect everything we’ve talked about.

An example is when you tell your family that you are trying to eat healthier, and they seem to enjoy telling you every time you do not. It does not seem to matter to them if you have done very well for a whole week. They often just tend to focus on the one time you did not, just to try to get you to downplay your efforts.

The same thing can happen when you decide to face your fears. Maybe you’re trying to deal with your driving phobia by taking small, different rides every day. But you can still ask your partner to drive you on a longer trip because you do not feel ready to do so. Just because of this, they can try to take lightly everything you have achieved so far, even ridicule it.

You still have the right to mess it up

These reactions can even occur when you try to improve your relationship. You may feel the need to improve communication, which is why you suggest to your partner that you both make a joint effort to do so.

But they may not make the effort to improve. The moment you lose your head and fall back into old communication patterns, they will take the opportunity to make counter-complaints.

“You should eat healthier.” “I thought you would overcome your fear of driving?” “What is it with all the mind? I thought you would be more understanding. ”

All of these questions and statements are basically reproaches. They are not created to support and encourage you to keep going. The intention is actually quite the opposite.

Why is this happening?

First, you need to know that this happens often. It is also important to realize that these types of reactions speak against those who do them.

People with a healthy emotional balance, who feel good about themselves and who have even gone through their own personal development process, would never try to hinder others.

In addition to this, it is important to emphasize that change is not always well received by those around you, even when it is to your advantage (and perhaps even to theirs).

Why is it like that? Because when we change, we force a change in the dynamics of relationships with other people. If one person ceases to be addicted, the other loses his position as superior.

If you decide to start communicating in a respectful way, you will no longer be involved in quarrels. If others are not willing to change, your efforts to improve may not please them.

Stay firm

Your job is to stand firm when you get these kinds of reactions from those around you. What you need to try to do is not fall into the trap of denying yourself the right to mess around.

If you really want to bring about inner change, you have to respect the process and find your rhythm. You do not have to be perfect. It’s even good to take a break, analyze how you are progressing, and then take a new course.

Growth is not linear and you will not be able to succeed every single day. To mess it up is not a relapse. A mistake does not mean the end of the road or that your plans failed.

Realize how important what you do is, and remember that you are trying to be a better person. But above all, remember that you still have the right to make mistakes.